I have something that I need to share about me.It is a deep emotional scar that I have.it all stemmed from an incident.I alluded to it on Tracy’s site in a comment I made.The problem is that I do not know how to talk about it with out the pain coming back to me.
It is in my nightmares. it is something that happened to me when my Dad flew off the handle before he got all the information.
Here goes nothing. one summer day we were out at my cousin’s house,for a summer outing.Keith and I were playing with a balsa wood glider,throwing it back and forth to each outer.When a gust of wind propelled it to the top of the roof where it dangled partially on and partially over the edge of the roof.
I went into the garage and grabbed a strip of wood that you use between paneling that you put up on walls.I used that to knock the plane off the roof.what I did not count on that because it was so flexible.the strip curled backwards striking my sister in the mouth.She went running and crying into the house that I had hit her.Which I did technically.My Dad flew in to a rage and gave me a real bad beating including shoving me into the storm door that was closed in the breezeway.The glass broke cutting my arm slightly,than Dad pushed me into the car and screamed at me not to leave the car. Mean while my cousin was trying to tell every body that is was an accident,and how it happened.
My mom and Aunt came to the car and took me into the house to clean up my arm.fortunately it was just a couple of scrapes that were not too bad once they were cleaned up. needless to say the scene replays in my head every once and a while of being beaten and shoved into glass door until it opened and the glass broke and than being thrown into the red and white colored 1960 Oldsmobile super 88 4 door sedan,that was the family car at the time. I have felt ashamed that this happened to me,and did not share it with too many people until now.I have shared this with every Psych doctor that I have had ever since I was in the air force.